I’ve been fortunate in the last two years to have found work and a home in a rural area. For the ten years previous, I lived in a small city. A bustling hub for people in their twenties, parties, festivals, a feverish community of artists….and a lot of noise. To put it short, I burnt out. I spent my twenties pfaffing about different social circles, learning new languages, partying, falling in love, falling OUT of love (waaaaay out of love, shall we say!) and having very little time alone to reflect on what all of this was doing to/for me.
When I finally did make the somewhat impulsive move to leave my job in the city and re-locate, wonderful things happened. Not always comfortable, but wonderful nonetheless. I had time to get to know myself. Without the constant need to ‘perform’ as is the norm for a 20-something year old female with a soft spot for hippies and eccentric play let loose in a city of hippies and awesome eccentrics! I discovered I am innately, NOT, the social butterfly I thought I was. When I arrived in this city, also a new country for me, at 20, I came out of my shell, so to speak. Now, at 31, I am happily and voluntarily going back INTO the shell! 🙂 I discovered that I do not need The Buzz of a hectic and drama-filled social life to inspire me. That silence and stillness does it even better. That eccentric characters are often….eccentric! And a lot of work. And that buzz-chasers who you meet at every party and share drinks with don’t always have the same aspirations or ethics as you. And that, basically, most people are just playing a role. Including you. After awhile it felt like I was at a Halloween party every day, with no clue who I was really talking to under the masks.
My happy place is not Happy Hour anymore, it’s my kitchen step looking out over the valley, or my bedroom window at night with a full view of the moon’s progression across the mountains. I would say it is a quiet life, but the noise the birds and sheep and wind make can be deafening and distracting sometimes! I have a few friends in the area, but don’t mind if I don’t see them everyday. Most of my closest friends are in other time zones, and that is totally cool with me also. My best friend is right here, and although I am still getting to know her, she’s all the company I need for now.